Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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