That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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