doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize