I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
