He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
