My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
