My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
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