Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
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