I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
