So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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