ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
