i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
When did angry sex become our thing?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
