I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
