Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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