just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Let's get the cat blown out
Randomize
