Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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