Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
