girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So vagazzling was a success
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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