I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
