I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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