Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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