he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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