What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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