do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
