i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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