awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
