bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
