Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
