at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
