I seem to have left my pride at pride
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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