how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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