The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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