I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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