Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
