Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
