Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
