Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
