i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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