I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
