i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
