Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize