I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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