We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
where are my eyebrows?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize