My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
