did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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