Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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