Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize