If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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