We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
