Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
