I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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