clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
